Jan. 1st, 2009 01:39 am
tortietta: (*mwah*)

To each and everyone of you, may 2009 bring you much joy and prosperity!!!

I can't say I'm sad to see the back of 2008. It's been a big year. A hard year, really. So, here's to 2009!

Most of you are yet to see the New Year in, so however you plan to spend the day/night, be safe and enjoy the company of those you love and hold dearest!
tortietta: (>:D<)
So, apparently the world may well end tomorrow. Or, it may not. No one can be quite sure of this.

Now, I'm not one to buy into discordant scientific claims that the world may end, but I do find it interesting the reaction that is generated when you tell someone that the world may end in a day.

Tell someone that the world may end and what is the first reaction? Some will assume it's a joke, a terrible joke, but a joke none-the-less. Some will panic, assume the worst. Others will take the news with a grain of salt but not over-react. The skeptics will be many, but so will the believers, and yet I think the gut instinct of most will be to make sure those they love and care about know this, regardless.

As for me, I'm not convinced the world will end. In fact, I would be more worried that the nay-saying scientists and the media will blow this so out of proportion that mass-induced hysteria will result as opposed to the world being sucked through a black hole.

Will I change what I plan to do tomorrow? No. Will I make a conscious effort to let those dearest to me know how I feel? Yes, but not because the world may end but because we should all do it more often than we do.

Mind you, this whole topic throws open the question, what would you do if the world was coming to an end? Is there is a list of things you would like to do before the end of the world? If you knew that the world really was coming to an end, how would you spend your last day? Is there anything you would say to someone if the world was ending that you wouldn't otherwise say? What would you do?

So, what say you, o'flist?
tortietta: (:()
On Friday night at 9.30pm our six year old black Labrador/Rottweiler cross, Draco, died.

I've grown up with dogs my whole life but Draco was something else. We always felt that with Draco there was a more intimate connection. Draco was not just a family pet, but he was part of the family.

For the last 9 months Draco has been living with my sister on the coast. Draco loved living with Bron. He was the centre of attention at all times.

Draco was torn away from us very suddenly. He got a Paralysis Tick in his eye on Thursday. He was taken to the vet on Friday afternoon as he was struggling to walk. They found the tick and removed it, gave him the anti-serum and told us all we could do was wait. He died that night.

He wasn't meant to die. I still don't know how he could be dead. In a matter of hours our dear Draco was dead.

My sister did everything possible. She checked him for ticks daily and made sure he was treated every 6 weeks accordingly. She was worried about him on Thursday night because he seemed to be limping but after consulting with Mum and Dad it was decided to leave it until the following morning as Draco was always such a wimp and was continually falling down the stairs and hurting himself.

I was with my parents this weekend and when the phone rang on Friday night I knew what had happened. I can still hear the choked sobs of my sister crying 'He's dead, Tor. He's dead. Tor, he's dead.'

At the end of the day I know he was just a dog, but it feels like a piece of my heart was ripped out on Friday night. Draco was so much more than just a dog. He was our family and now he's gone.

My poor darling sister is all on her own and while she's got friends to help her it won't stop her from hurting. All of a sudden Draco is gone and she's going to notice it physically.

Both Mum and Bron are blaming themselves. They feel they let Draco down, that if they had done something sooner he would be okay, but there is nothing more they could of done.

I've felt so selfish grieving for my dog. I feel like I shouldn't be allowed to grieve because he was only a dog, but none of us can do that. We're all a little bit broken now.

I've lost plenty of animals over the years but I have never felt this way before. I find it hard to believe that he is really dead.

I don't know how to explain any of this. I don't know how to put any of it into words, how to explain just how special Draco was to us. It all happened so quickly. Our best friend, our family, gone.

I feel shattered and worn and I just want to see my dog one more time and I never will again.

Oh, Draco. You will be remembered by many.

Remembering Draco )
tortietta: (mind wander)
A little over two weeks ago I decided I'd try to reread all six Harry Potter books before the release of Deathly Hallows. I never thought I'd get through all six in such a short time frame however I surprised myself and when I closed HBP on Friday night I knew it had been worth it.

I had forgotten just how much I loved these books. For me, so much of the joy of these books is the reading experience itself. The moments that catch you up and make you laugh and scream and cry, those chapters that you just can't put down no matter what, those times where you feel your heart pounding and your eyes stinging and your voice caught in your throat - every moment of the reading experience makes these books just that much more special.

The more I read the more I wanted talk about the books again. I remembered the desire I had when I first finished GoF in mid 2001 to find out more, to get my hands on anything I could. I was drawn to fandom, to the old yahoo groups and the smattering of fan fiction which ultimately led me to here, and I realised just how much I missed this. Missed fandom, missed the friends I had made through it, missed the discussions and theorizing.

Friday night I kept putting off reading the last 50 pages of HBP. I didn't want it to end. I knew that when I finally closed HBP that there was only one more step to take in this incredible journey. A step we have all been waiting for; a step that would ultimately bring some form of closure to this wonderful experience.

Which brings me to Saturday morning. The waiting. The nerves. The excitement. Everything culminating in the moment when I finally had DH in my hands. Wanting nothing more than to open it right away, but knowing that I wanted to read it slowly, to savour every word. I didn't want to rush this last journey, and I am so thankful now that I took my time to enjoy every word because the wait was so worth it.

As I said earlier so much of my joy of these books comes from the reading experience itself, and I wasn't disappointed this last time. I laughed, I cried, I shrieked and shouted. Some chapters I'd read and then stop to reflect on them, other chapters I found myself rereading just after I'd read them, and other chapters I'd fly through with my heart pounding and my head spinning. So was it worth it? Was it worth the wait? Was it worth drinking in every single word and savouring it? Hell yes.

Knowing that I've now closed the book on this last journey and that it's finally over, that there is no going back, no more first times, no more guessing and theorizing, well, it's like saying goodbye to one of your closest friends for good. The memories will always be there. The story will always stay the same, but the experience, well the experience will never be the same. Every reread will bring something new to the surface, every time the seven books are read in sequence I'll feel the magic, but there's nothing more to add to the journey and I think that in itself is gut wrenching.

When I finally finished DH I didn't know what to think, what to feel. I wanted to reread it straight away and yet I couldn't bring myself open the book again. I felt hollow and yet completely satisfied. The closure had come, and I had loved nearly every moment of it.

It's going to take a little while before I can really formulate any thoughts on the book. I want to reread it but I'm going to wait a few days before I pick it back up again because I'm still letting this all just sink in.

The reading experience may never be same, but I can't wait to see how everyone enjoyed their experiences. I'm so glad this has drawn me back here, reminded me how much I loved this place, how much I missed so many of you. The reading experience is only part of this journey and I am so glad that I get to share the rest of the experience with all of you.
tortietta: (slightly crazed)
Gosh. I miss this. I really, really miss this. It's been far too long since I was last here.

I have no idea where to start, and even less of an idea where to end. I think I've spent more time away from home than I have at home recently, and I feel as lost there as I do here. I miss you all. I have idea what's going on with anyone, but I do hope you're all well.

But, I'm back and I've missed this place and I've missed all of you more than I can say. ♥
tortietta: (Default)

No more 'maevy'! Yay!

I always thought I'd feel a twinge of regret if I ever changed my username, but I don't. I've finally broken that last tie I had to a time I would much rather forget, and it's surprisingly freeing.

So, 'maevy' is now [livejournal.com profile] tortietta, which is going to take me a while to get used to, and I'm going to have to re-haul a few of my icons, but yay!

Out with the old and in with the new!


Oct. 17th, 2006 11:41 am
tortietta: (make a wish)

I miss LJ. I miss all of you. ♥

I've tried catching up. I've often thought about posting something, but I feel lousy just thinking it because I know I don't have time to find out what's going on with all of you. I'm going to try changing that. I'm still here, and I still care. It's just been a long, hard, busy year.

So. I think I need something to get everything rolling again.

Tell me something new? Something exciting? Something silly? Ask me a question. Ask me anything. Tell me something random? Anything really. I guess just, how are you?


Jun. 21st, 2006 10:14 am
tortietta: (christmas icon from figgy)
I need to take a break from LJ. I'm not going to go into long explanations. I've hardly been around for close to three months now, and unfortunately this is just the next step. I don't know when I'll be back, or even if I'll be back, but I don't want to lose the friendships that I have here. I'm going to miss you all. Be happy and be safe, and maybe I'll see you on the flip side. ♥
tortietta: (love)
I feel like a fish out of water at the moment, and I have a thousand things going on, but no mattered how crazy things are I can't forget the birthdays (albeit, all slightly belated) of three wonderful people.

Happy, HAPPY birthday to [livejournal.com profile] shoemaster, [livejournal.com profile] akscully and [livejournal.com profile] kairos103! I hope you all had wonderful days and that the year to come is as wonderful as you all are. Much love to all of you. ♥
tortietta: (One of those days)
Oh man. Wish I had time to think. Seriously, my head is like mush at the moment.

Ah. First time in over an hour where I've had more than 20 seconds between calls. Absolute bliss.

As much as I like being able to see how many incoming calls we have, watching call after call queue up and knowing that there is nothing you can do to hurry along your already well over the time-limit call is incredibly frustrating.

Also, I'm amazed at the persistence and patience of some people. Honestly, I hate waiting on the phone for more than five minutes, but some of these people are quite happy to hold on the line for more than 10 minutes for a silly little problem.

Actually, I'm sure I'm not the only one who hates waiting on the line for assistance, be it computer assistance or some other form of assistance. So, how long is too long to wait?

[Poll #686148]

Ah, I knew the quiet was too good to last. One day I might actually have time to catch up on everything, that is, if I ever get a quiet night or a quiet weekend but seeing as this hasn't happened in weeks I can't see that changing anytime soon.
tortietta: (bitch please)
Someone kill me. Please.

I'm just about ready to scream.

Network broken. Microwave links down. Hundreds of pissed off clients. Lots of pissed off colleagues. Wish clients would stop blaming me. IT'S NOT MY FAULT THE NETWORK KEEPS DYING! We can't do anything either!

Oh my god. Shitty, shitty day, which just keeps getting worse. *sobs*

Someone save me. Tell me something good. Something funny. Even just something nice.

:O :O :O

Jan. 28th, 2006 05:03 pm
tortietta: (bitch please)



Sometimes I don't think it's possible that I'm the daughter of a chef. *headdesk*


I think I might just have a beer instead. *sigh*
tortietta: (lose yourself)
Let's celebrate the good things!

First good thing: I'm now officially on holidays for nearly three weeks, YAY!

Second good thing: I'm buying I've BOUGHT a car! YAY!

Third good thing: Three years ago today I was given a LJ code by a lovely fandomer, although at the time I didn't think I'd ever actually use LJ. However, if it wasn't for the generosity of that lovely person I wouldn't have had the opportunity to get to know all of you. You're all incredible, and I am so thankful that I've been fortunate enough to get to know you all. So, YAY for my three year LJ anniversary! :D

And because [livejournal.com profile] kairos103 did this the other day and it looked like fun but as usual I had no time to comment until far too late in the game, a meme!

1. Post a list of up to 15 books/movies/anime/TV shows/video games/etc. that you've had an obsessive fannish love of at some time in your life
2. Have your friends list guess your favourite character from each item.
3. Post in your own journal.

1. The Sooty Show
2. Press Gang
3. The 'Tomorrow' series
4. Lois & Clark: The New Adventures of Superman
5. M*A*S*H
6. Firefly
7. Lord of the Rings
8. The Hobbit
9. Thursday Next
10. The X-Files
11. The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy
12. Neighbours (circa ~ '98 and present)
13. The Pern series
14. Full House
15. Harry Potter
tortietta: (>:D<)
Well the holiday season is beginning to kick in once again, and it's about that time of year to start collecting addresses and writing cards!

I know there are some people who feel awkward about giving out their addresses, but please don't feel that by giving me your address you're asking for a card. I want to give you all cards but to do this I need your help!

I understand that some people feel uncomfortable giving address out via LJ so I'm giving two options this year. All comments to this post will be screened so you can leave your address details here, or you can click here to send me an email.

I love Christmas. I love the holiday season. I love the cheer, and the happiness. I love the baking, and the shopping, and the crowds, and the heat. I love thinking of things I can give to people; things I know will make them happy. I love sending cards; doing things I wouldn't normally do to let people know I'm thinking about them and that I care about them.

Each and everyone one you is special to me. Sending holiday cards is the least I can do to show you how special you are and to share the joy of the season with you all. ♥
tortietta: (I am Australian)
For most of you on my flist this won't affect you, but for the handful of Australian's here, I urge you all to attend your local Industrial Relations protests today. You will be joined by hundreds of thousands of other Australians who will be telling the Government that our rights at work are worth fighting for. Howard's radical Industrial Relations changes are not just an attack on the workers - they fundamentally undermine the values that make Australia great. This is our country and these are our rights. These changes may not affect you now but if something is not done to put a stop to them, then we are just letting the Government take away even more of our rights.

Freedom of speech may be at jeopardy in this country, but we still have a voice and we still have the power to use it. Don't let the Government walk all over the workers of Australia. Stand up and make a stand.

Many protests have already started, but go here to find your local protest.
tortietta: (>:D<)
I haven't done one of these in a long while, but I think a lot of people are feeling a little low at the moment and we all need to be told how special we are from time to time.


Comment. Then I'll say something I honestly adore about you. ♥

Gacked from the ever lovely [livejournal.com profile] figgy. ♥
tortietta: (:(()
I'm not coping with a lot of things that I should be coping with at the moment. I feel like I'm falling apart at the seams and I can't let myself do that.

I normally wouldn't do this and I feel pathetic for even doing this, but I could really use a hug or two at the moment. ♥
tortietta: (OMG)
Three Good:

1) I got my hair cut last Thursday and it's shooort but nice. My hair was down past my shoulder blades and now it's just under my ears. I don't think I've had my hair this short in close to ten years. It's an odd feeling.

2) I sent a letter to my biological father yesterday. I realised that while I'm ready to let go, I need him to know how I feel so that I don't keep hoping that maybe one day things will be different. Writing the letter? That was bloody hard, but actually sending it? Such a wonderful feeling of release.

3) Going to sleep with Lily curled up next to me. Best feeling ever. Yep.

Three Bad:

1) My hair! Okay, so it's not exactly bad but I'm still not sure if I like it or not. I put a lightner through it on Saturday because I thought it looked too dark and frumpy and now I'm not sure if the lightner hasn't made it look too ... teeny. Every morning I think I like it and yet every night I think I hate it. :-S

2) The potential fallout from the letter I sent to my biological father. Honestly, I think I'm over-reacting with this one but I keep freaking out that things could get really ugly after this. I did this for me, and I feel great for doing it, but I know how my biological father can be and it scares me to think of how he might react to this.

3) My house looks like a bomb has hit it. Seriously. I keep telling myself that I just need to get down and clean but every time I do I just see pile after pile of dirty clothes and dishes and a thousand other things to do and always manage to do something else instead.

Three Cool, or Three Things I Need To Spend A Lot Of Money On Before Christmas But Which Are Still Cool:

1) A car. I have put this off for years but it has got to a point where I can't put driving off any longer. The thing that really sealed the deal with this was realising that despite the high petrol prices it's STILL cheaper for me to drive to my parents for Chrismtas than it is to fly -- keeping in mind that my parents live nearly 1000km (621 miles) from me.

2) A new computer. Specifically, a Mac PowerBook. My poor old desktop is dying and the more strain I put on it the more I realise that this needs to get rectified as soon as possible. The simple solution to this is to buy a PowerBook through salary sacrificing, but it's still a lot of money.

3) A clothes dryer. Okay, so I don't really need this before Christmas but it would make life so, so much easier. The saddest thing is that this is by far the cheapest of these three things and probably the least likely thing I get. Woe.
tortietta: (I am Australian)
You know what? I'm happy that England won. I'm happy that after 18 years England have finally managed to best the Australian's. The English played hard and there is no denying that they were the stronger team throughout the series.

The English deserve their celebration; they deserve their accolades; they deserve that elusive urn. I'll be the first to admit that the Australian team was let down by under-form players, by openers who couldn't keep it together, by a middle order that was sorely lacking and by a bowling contingent who just didn't have what it takes to beat England. And let's not forget the lack of real captaincy.

However ... however ...

Just because England have managed to regain the Ashes does not mean that they are now the best cricketing team in the world. This was not the World Cup. It has taken 18 years for the English to beat Australia at the Ashes. After 18 years one series win does not make you the best in the world. Australian cricket isn't dead. Admittedly the Australian selectors need to take a long hard look at the Australian team and captaincy, but don't for a minute assume that Australian cricket is dead. Australia has the been the best team in the world for a long time, that doesn't change just because we lost the Ashes. We'll be back and when we are we'll be stronger than ever. Australian cricket is still very much alive.
tortietta: (I am Australian)

Not because of the light! NOT THE LIGHT! They were playing SPIN BOWLERS! They weren't even playing pace bowlers!


I can't believe it.


tortietta: (Default)

January 2009



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